Blueberries vs. Botox

I was curious about aging. Not that I want to know how to do it - I really want to learn how NOT to do it. I came across an article titled "Aging Gracefully and Naturally." (If you want to read it go here: http://www.webmd.com/healthy-aging/features/aging-gracefully-naturally) I was pretty sure this was going to be about accepting yourself as you are and being the best person you can be [yawn]. I found the article on WebMD so I figured it had at least some credibility. The article didn't say anything about acceptance or being your best self. What it did was discuss the option of blueberries instead of Botox! What??

The article said that the large number of antioxidants found in blueberries can save cells from premature aging and could compete with Botox. That's nice - but can I get rid of frown lines by rubbing a blueberry over them? I noticed that there was no mention of getting rid of existing lines; just preventing lines. Still, this is good information. I am considering eating five or ten pounds of blueberries a day to save my cells from premature aging. I want to know how the blueberries decide if I'm succumbing to premature aging or if I'm just plain old!

There was also some mention of blueberry extract and improved short term memory, balance and coordination, and possible cancer prevention. Of course, the beneficiaries of these wonderful side effects are rats. Still, I know that, at times, I've been perceived as a bit of a rat so maybe it would work for me.

One of the most interesting things in the article was the mention of Botox parties. I may lead a sheltered life - but really - Botox parties? Somehow, I just can't conceive of getting all dressed up to go out for the evening and instead of a wonderful dinner at a nice restaurant, I get needles in my face. This is entertainment? I realize that I'm probably the last to know about these parties, but it makes me think that the next thing you know, we'll be having group pelvic exams - Yikes!

I followed the Botox party idea and found an article on howcast.com titled How to Host a Botox Party (http://www.howcast.com/guides/1210-How-To-Host-a-Botox-Party). In 10 easy steps you too can host a Botox party! Step 1 states that you need to have a board-certified plastic surgeon or dermatologist at your party. This one just brings to mind disturbing images starring Party Doctors competing for the next gig. Can you imagine hiring doctors the way you hire clowns for childrens parties or that male stripper for your friend's fourtieth surprise birthday bash? This troubles me. Back to the party. As I read the article, I discovered that if you put on a Botox party, you are actually committing to two parties. The second party is the post procedure follow-up. Am I the only one that doesn't quite get this?

I noticed that when I entered "botox party" in the Google search field, an ad showed up that I considered to be a little deceptive. It said 100 Units for $129. This gets attention because botox costs an average of $12 - $14 a unit. Since the search word I used was Botox, I automatically assumed that the ad was for Botox. Not so. This is a do-it-yourself kit that provides you with 100 units of Wrinkle Freeze, instructions and a "teeny little needle." This causes me much greater concern than the Botox parties. I asked my doctor about Botox and he said that there are places that sell "bootleg botox." He explained that most of the adverse side effects that we hear about come from people who are being treated with less than the real thing. He added that if it doesn't say Botox®, then, it's NOT Botox. I think I just found one of those "less than the real thing" products. The company claims that their products are "(...) real, pharmacuetical grade treatment solutions." Hmmm...real treatment solutions for what? I wonder. I followed the link to the customer forum. Here, the people are all calling the solution Botox. It appears that they believe they are using the real thing. Can you say SCAM?

Back to the Blueberries. I don't think I'll be able to search out any bootleg blueberry distributers. Even if blueberries don't get rid of the lines between my eyebrows, they still taste good and might just give the rest of me a few extra years. I really could use improved coordination, I've been a bit of a klutz most of my life. Improved memory would be nice too. Would I pick blueberries over Botox? Probably not. By the time I eat enough blueberries (or enough blueberry extract) to counter premature aging, I'll be in the mature aging category and the offer will be void.